Justine Neale, 37, and Denise Sinclair, 43, both held high-profile positions in PR and corporate relations when before they had their children. And like many mothers, giving up work to be stay-at-home mothers did not come into the equation.
Luckily for them they knew each other and were able to present their case together when a role came up in a department at BT.
“Eighteen months ago, our marketing organisation was going through a change period and many people were re-applying for their own jobs/new positions,” recalls Justine. “A new full-time position was advertised which I mentioned to Justine, who like me was on a part-time contract.
“We approached the manager concerned ? who had worked with me in the preceding months but had not worked with Justine – to see if she would consider a joint application from us as ‘job-sharers’.
“We outlined the benefits: full-time cover across the working week plus at least half a day overlap for handover, 52ish weeks cover as we try not to overlap our holidays, flexibility of days when needed for specific projects, two brains’ worth of creative ideas, two complimentary but different career backgrounds/skills and contacts/working relationships across the business/externally ? and she agreed it would be a proposition not to be missed.
“We both interviewed for the job and were delighted to be offered the role and have been happily job sharing ever since!”
Flexible working, for those who have experienced it, can sound fantastic on paper. But like anything it also has it’s downsides, and job-sharing is not different. The question is: how do Justine and Denise make it work for them?
What was the motivating factor for staying in work?
Justine: Money, plus already working for a flexible employer so I thought I could make it work. Also I didn’t want to be dependant financially on my husband. I was slightly worried about becoming ‘brain dead’ and ‘mumsy’ and losing my own identity. Wanted my children to attend nursery as very good socially, although didn’t want them to attend more than three days per week, my parents offered help for one day a week so they just attend/attended nursery for two days only.
Denise: I had an exciting career ahead of me when the children came along and I decided to try and do both (motherhood and working) because I valued my financial independence, for me my work is linked to feelings of self worth and I like the mental stimulation.
What are the best bits about staying in work while you have raised your children?
Denise: Obviously, the money brings choice. My children get to try/do more things than if I was a stay-at-home Mum. I can afford the things I want for myself, gym membership for example, that would be luxuries if I didn’t work. My children are incredibly sociable because they have been in the nursery/pre-school, social environments from such a young age they are really independent. We value the time we have together more because it’s not automatic. The separation does us all good as we enjoy seeing each other again. I also think they see a good role model which is not a driver for me but certainly worth knowing they view it as a positive.
Justine: Space from the children and the house, to be my own person, having the money for nice family holidays and luxuries and to secure a better future for my girls. For my children to establish fantastic relationships with carers and have other influences apart from me. That the time spent with my children is almost always quality time and well thought out.
If you could have your time again would you make a different choice?
Justine: No
Denise: It’s been tempting at times to think that not working would be easier or more fun. I have a number of non-working mum friends (ladies who lunch) now all their kids are in school and I remember them saying: ?Don’t you think you’d achieve any more by not working? You would slow right down?, (which may be nice for a while) but then you’d be bored. So in summary I knew that although it would be tempting to stop being organised all the time, I’d soon hanker for it and would probably make myself a job/business. Working for a large corporate with all the employee benefits of a structure is the easier option.
Has working and raising a family been challenging? If you how?
Justine: Yes. The job can be very demanding and pressurising and at these times I can get more irritated with my children and hubby ? that’s the worst part. When I have to be away from home (thankfully only three to four times a year overnight, but long days in London every three weeks or so) I have to rely on my husband being around to do the parenting on those days and if he didn’t have flexibility in his job, there’s no way I could do it. I become more tired so really make an effort to eat healthily. I have help with the housework as it’s impossible to do everything. When both my children are at school, it will become much easier as it’s difficult having them in different places, plus I will get time to myself on my days off, whether to do domestic activity or e.g. get a haircut!
Denise: If you how? Sometimes. When the project deadlines are approaching, just like any other team/member you have to bring things in on time. Adrenaline kicks in and you work extra hard. Putting in more hours around these times is the hardest thing because you need to arrange extra childcare, at short notice, and depend on more people. In our case we are fortunate to have an interesting role and value that so we take on the challenges each time. If it was too tough we’d have to make the decision to apply for a less high profile or demanding role.
How have you managed to stay on top of your career with the demands of motherhood?
Justine: I am no way on top of my career: it’s more about being able to deliver, to meet my objectives, to perform well so I’m securing the ‘right’ to my role. Personally, I don’t have a career path or progression mapped out – that’s 50% my employer’s remiss, 50% mine. I define personal success on a daily or weekly (bear in mind I do three days a week) basis to keep my motivation up. I work with some highly intelligent and dedicated people so that alone is motivating, but let’s make no bones about it, it’s not easy.
Denise: Just constant organisation! And working in the evenings when all is quiet when they are in bed. I use every spare minute [to add to my shopping list, make a calls etc]. I’ve also been incredibly lucky that my parents are willing to help out and live nearby. Also, my partner is self-employed and doesn’t leave the house before 9am so he helps with the morning routine and if I have to travel he’s able to take over and flex his work.
What has been the high point along the way?
Justine: Getting a job share partner. I have been very lucky, Denise and my skills compliment each other, we’re mature in our careers, we have a good understanding of each other and our work styles. We’re open and honest and in the same situation so it’s great to have a confidante.
Denise: For me the high-point was when I started job-sharing. For four years I worked part-time and carried my projects alone, which was tough at times. When I started job-sharing everything fell into place. Job-sharing is easy if you find the right partner. That’s the key. I’d recommend it for anyone who’s trying to balance work and life.
What is your worst experience along the way?
Justine: Having to work double my hours for on average three months a year on busy periods and only having the time to do this when the children have gone to bed so I often feel shattered. More often than not, this has been without any reward/extra pay.
Denise: Working 40 hours and being paid for 21 for a number of weeks! People would say ?don’t do it? or ?get the company to pay you? but that’s not an option at senior level. Also, as a part-timer you try harder NOT to complain as you value your ability to work just the hours you need to at certain times and you don’t want people to think you can’t cope. So you cope but that was before job share and now it’s rare to work ‘double’ the hours.
Any tips for expectant mums, or mothers who feel that you can’t have a successful career and a happy family life at the same time?
Justine: Be organised. Plan time for yourself, even if only an hour a week, plan time for yourself as a couple, be prepared to try it and make changes until things feel right. Children benefit from nursery, but this is too expensive for some parents so think about splitting childcare between a childminder, nursery, or even family member. Give yourself at least 3 months to settle back into work, perhaps 6 if returning part time. If it doesn’t work, you’ve not failed.
Denise: you never would have know unless you had tried it
Denise: A good support network is key. When my kids were in nursery I had a back-up (my parents) for when they were sick, which was rare thank goodness. But when they are tiny the nursery can refuse to take them if they are a little poorly. It can be stressful if you are torn between work and sick kids. Employers are tolerant to a point but you need to know and sometimes show you have a back-up plan. Although part-time means you can flex i.e. move working time/days around if you have taken time off to look after the kids. Trust your gut feeling when choosing a nursery or child minder (as well as all those reports). Look at the children are they all happy? And the carers!
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