Part of being a working mum is feeling guilty about leaving your children in someone else’s care. For me the worst time by far is in the school summer holidays. This stems partly from a dim but happy recollection of my own childhood and the endless lazy days of summer spent cycling, exploring, going to friends? houses and watching summer kids TV. Now, after the three weeks holiday that my employer has generously allowed me, my two children need to go back into the capable hands of others.
The guilt starts when, instead of a lie-in, my daughters are being chivvied back to a morning routine of rushing around finding lunchboxes, coats, bags, hair-bands and favourite toys. It’s not so bad for my confident 2 year old who’s returning to her day nursery. There are a few tears initially but as she realises she’s back in a familiar environment surrounded by Dora the Explorer-clad toddlers who’ve gathered round to inspect their returning friend, she’s almost looking excited. But for my 7 year old, who’s quite reserved and more than a little shy, it’s a different case altogether. She’s headed for a summer day camp. Whereas her usual after-school club means class-mates in a familiar environment, day camp means a room full of strangers and an unfamiliar location.
Ten minutes after arriving at the club I feel confident enough to leave her. There’s lots of cheerful looking ‘team leaders’ and other children of a similar age. With a clear image of my child looking solemn and abandoned etched on my memory I rush off to work. Hours later, and still racked with guilt, I return to find her bubbling with excitement about the number of art, drama, sport and dance activities she’s managed to squeeze in. She’s also got a plastic trophy to bring home as she’s ‘star of the day’. It makes my old summer holidays appear dull but I’m glad that she’s happy. As the camp leader says, at out departure, “it’s always worse for the parents.”
