Tanith Carey’s book, ‘How to be an ‘Amazing Mum’ When You Just Don’t Have the Time’, really is the perfect handbook for stressed mums. We love it because it gives fantastic advice that is lighthearted, yet insightful in a way that only a real working mum can. Here is an extract from the book offering tips for working mums – enjoy!
Tips for Working Mothers
Don’t take kids into the office: For all the colleagues who coo, there will be others who will think it proves your priorities lie elsewhere. Even though they probably do, don’t remind them.
Don’t be bothered by resentment: Of course there will be some people who won’t like the fact that you’ve got more flexible hours or are working part time. Don’t take it personally. How colleagues respond will also depend on where they are at in their lives. The twenty-something with a long-term partner who is planning to have kids soon is likely to be a lot more sympathetic than the forty-something who’s never found the right man or decided not to have children. Try to shake it off by being as relaxed and professional as possible, and by trying to help them out as much as you can in the time available to you.
Screen your calls: Unnecessarily long phone conversations can really eat into your precious time. So politely tell people at the very start of the conversation how long you’ve got.
Don’t say yes to everything: If you are not sure how to phrase a ‘no’ to a request, ask to check your diary first. To save offence, explain why you can’t do it or suggest someone else who might be able to help.
Don’t go into too much detail: You may need to rearrange your schedule for your child’s sports day, but your colleagues don’t need to know that. But do warn your workmates as far as possible in advance when you will be off and prepare for it.
Beware of smug mummies: They’re the ones who make out they have it all under control and don’t know what you are talking about when you’re honest about how stressed you are. Some women just have an investment in appearing to be on top of it all. They’d rather die than admit they’re not. They’ve either got so much help in the form of bend-overbackwards parents, nannies and cleaners or they’re simply not trying to do as much as you are. Just smile to yourself and don’t fall for it.
Don’t compare: Don’t compare yourself with your childless colleagues. Plenty of people who work full time also spend a huge amount of time hanging out at the coffee machine, going on cigarette breaks and socialising. Don’t beat yourself up by comparing yourself with full-time mums, either. You probably imagine they are with their children every second of the day playing tea parties. But they’re not with their kids 24/7 either. They are probably spending just as much time at the shops, having coffee, chatting to other mums and cleaning up the mess their children have made at home.
How to be an ‘Amazing Mum’ When You Just Don’t Have the Time is published by Lion Hudson. Price £7.99
